(owl flying and hooting)
Dad: What's this? A letter at this time of night?
Mom: Who is it for?
Harry: Hey it's probably for me because i'm so important.
Dad: It says here that it addressed to Ned.
Ned: Yay! Mail for me!
Ned: Yay! I've been invited to learn how to become a wizard at Hogwarts!
Dad: Give it here.
Dad: That's not what it says.
Dad: It says that you've been diagnosed with Hogwarts, The disease!
Ned: The what now?
Ned: Oh! What's happening to (oinking) me?
(laughter and squealing)